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And you thought rubber suits were just
for kinky freaks....
 The G-Man returns this year for Godzilla 2000 - and
it's Matthew Broderick free! Toho, the original movie studio that produced
the films, has stepped back into the ring to redeem the king of movie monsters from the
1999 big-budget, nuclear-powered flop!
From what we've heard, in the new flick, set to open 8/18, Godzilla will battle aliens
in UFO's. Thanks, Toho — stick to what ya know!
Official Toho Website
Here's what we know so far:
 | The new Godzilla (yes! he's new!) looks bigger, badder and even thinner, than
his previous incarnations. The back spines are more jagged and pronounced. His mouth looks
more open. |
| For diehard fans (who are aware that the original Godzilla perished in Godzilla vs.
Destroyah from nuclear heartburn), will be amazed to discover that this newer
Godzilla is actually shorter than the last Godzilla! He'll
actually be half the height of the original. |
* Editor's note:
In Godzilla vs. Destroyah, the Big "G" fights such a
titanic battle that he literally overheats! His skin glows molten red, and his back spines
melt! He releases enormous amounts of radiation...
[scene of many sad Japanese people, mourning the loss of the super
monster that crushes their beloved Tokyo every few years]
OK. Stay with me.
But Godzilla's son was nearby at the time (I didn't even know he was
dating!) and absorbed all the excess radiation, which gave him an enormous growth spurt,
and now he's the new Godzilla, which would account for his small size, and smaller gut.
But he's growing!
| He'll be battling aliens in UFO's and a creature called
Megaguiras — we've heard it's some kind of giant, greek insect. That's a joke. |
| The Japanese are so pissed at having their capital crushed by giant monsters they have
developed a new plan to rid themselves of giant rubber-suited men forever! They call it:
"The G-Vanishing Operation" (Ed. Note: God, I love the Japanese...) It's sounds
like some kind of detergent! |
| Part of the above plan involves a new weapon called a "Artificial Black Hole
Generator" - Ooooo! Sounds scary! |
Stay Tuned For More G-ossip from
Will, our resident G-Fan!
'Godzilla Treat
of the Week' |
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The G-Man Gets Jiggy Wid It! |
Here's a site you must visit!
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