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Synopsis: The Earth is conquered by aliens. Humans now live like savages in caves. One neanderthal rises to lead humanity to take back the planet.
A movie adaptation of L. Ron Hubbard's novel of the same title, Battlefield
Earth stinks to high heaven.
And they're just a bunch of morons! It's unbelievable that they could take over the Earth. The Psyclos basically look like big Rastafarian guys, in big platform shoes. Like a poor man's Klingon. They also have six fingers, which I counted while looking at the obviously fake, rubber monster hands Travolta was wearing. He spends most of the movie saying, "Mwah-hahahahaaaa!" Why on Earth someone like Travolta would pick a film like this to star in is beyond me. It may be because he's a Scientologist - the cult that L. Ron Hubbard founded before his death. Talk about selling your soul... Besides the schlocky aliens, the plot (to save humanity!) resembles a poorly planned bank heist. Humans are now like ape-people. But the human hero (Johnny) finds the U.S. Constitution in the ruins of D.C., and is suddenly inspired to save his brethren. Ahem. Luckily, Johnny finds a huge underground bunker filled with Harrier Jump Jet planes — all still in good condition! He then proceeds to parade his fellow ape-men through a flight simulator, and in minutes, he has an army. Johnny wisely decides that rather than just freeing the Earth itself, it might be better to just destroy the Psychlos' home planet. He accomplishes this by teleporting a nuclear bomb (which he knows how to operate) to their homeworld — which conveniently has a highly flammable atmosphere. One nuke destroys the whole planet in one big kaboom. Yaaay! Character development was also pathetic - moviegoers are goaded into feeling for the noble human savages who made their last stand against the aliens. The music is bold, daring and heroic. But I felt nothing, nada! The action was interesting for a while, but without a real plot, I soon didn't know, or care what was going on. I was just waiting for the credits to scroll. I hereby award this movie...
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Reviewed by CJ